San Francisco

Fearless they walked the streets,
The sky painted a brilliant blue,
Hands intertwined and sparkling eyes,
Stronger than any strength they knew.

Accross a broken landscape,
Was art by the greatest hearts;
Written among the brightest stars,
Risen from ashes of forgotten parts.

Darkness and ignorance knew no place,
Because what hatred would you bear,
To think wrong of beauty and love,
To dissect the energy of the air.

And so half a century ago they stood,
To make sure the world understood,
That to be true was to have the fire of the brightest stars,
To be brave was to be proud, to ask, do you know who you are?

Diary of the Moon in December.

The world looks so beautiful from here. The blue of the waters looks so gorgeous right now in the dark. At Least on this side. My love, the sun must be lighting up the world on the other side. They don’t see the beauty in sleeping with the colour of the sky as dark as their foggy eyes and then waking up to the gorgeous light blue sky and seeing the sunbeams mirror the calm and peace of their morning minds.

Oh I love these humans so much. I love how at night, the more curious ones, my favourite ones, look up at the sky and sometimes I can see my mates, the stars, being reflected in them. They look so in awe as they lay down. Some put on music to accompany their thoughts and wonder whereas the others lay there in solitude and silence. And they just look at me like I’m the most beautiful body in the universe. Maybe that’s why I love them the most, maybe I’m selfish.

But that doesn’t stop me from knowing that they are wrong.

I am not beautiful. I am not the greatest thing they have seen. I have spots and craters on my body. Where there should be a smooth expanse of milky sand, I have dips and mounds. Oh and there is a side of me that no one has even seen. How they think they love me when they don’t even see me for who I am. I don’t have my own light, I just take it from my sun, my lovely lovely sun. I am not enough on my own. I am never gonna be enough.

I am not the one because of whom little children beg to go play outside. I am not the one because of whom the sunflowers forget their stationery nature to face the brighter side. I am not the one who lights up people’s worlds because my light is not even my light. No matter how many bright eyed, curious humans think so, I am not the beautiful creature they think I am. Heck, I cant even be with the one I love because we are always separated. And during the rare times that we even get to be together, everyone hides in their homes and never even looks up. Because who wants to see the most beautiful thing in the world, which lights up a whole solar system, be hidden by the dull, dark creature that I am.

I used to let it hurt me before, but now it’s just a fact. My love tells me I’m beautiful everyday, but I know it’s just to be nice. Thing is, I know very well that I’m never going to be perfect. I’m never going to be the one who makes people happy.

I am never going to be enough.

To know a heart.

To know a heart was to know the sound 
Of rain on the cheek that was drenched before.
To know a heart was to leave the spirits you drowned,
To keep the worth of the things you swore.

To know a heart is to have the vision,
That no eyes ever seemed to know,
To know the veil of a forgotten religion,
To see beauty in a purple-pink rainbow.

To know a heart is to know a fire
That burnt the treacherous words of liars
To feel the kiss of a strength that never did tire
To know the truth behind gorgeous false attires.

To know a heart, they said one must be brave,
Maybe even have the heroic strength that is needed to fold,
But happiness is what every hero at her death did crave,
Because to know a heart was the greatest lie ever told.

Treacherous sin

Treacherous Sin.

Did it hurt enough? When the river went red?
Did your eyes look away in a horrid rush?
Did you feed the holy fantasies you had bred?
Do you truly have the audacity to say hush?

Because your hands were covered with that shroud of hate,
The world fell apart at the behest of your pen,
You made the call and made us the bait
You took the shot, ten out of ten.

And you looked to me with sorry eyes,
When you knew the hour glass had run.
It may take you a million tries,
But you won’t be able to blow the smoke off this gun.

Because that smoke choked the freedom of our throats,
The fire burnt the last shred of broken respect,
You stood there in your blood hued coats
Our hearts were the toys you did dissect.

The veins of your callous hands are filled with stones,
Of a treacherous land that you made out of drones.
But you unveiled to us the strength of our bones,
You forced us to make sure our goodbyes were told.

And then you said that this is treachery of god,
You said this is the sigh of the mind,
But at the end of the day who are you to know god,
Because god wouldn’t even want to look at your kind.
Because god knows the language of hate won’t win,
And your hate and treachery is the greatest sin.

-N

A thousand miles away.

I had left everything on the ground, All thoughts worries and pain.

I was cruising peacefully through the clouds;

I tried to sleep, but all in vain.

But still one thing made its way,

Into my mind, a thousand miles away.

The beauty of the clouds reminded me,

Of the beauty of someone else I know;

The warmth of the sun hugged me,

With it’s similar ethereal glow.

Sixteen thousand feet weren’t enough to stay,

Away from this, a thousand miles away.

I never thought myself as one,

Of the poetic hopeless romantics;

But God knows what you had done,

To make me so fond of your antics.

I thought I’d be alone this day,

But you were with me, a thousand miles away.

The cotton candy had some turbulence still,

Well we all know that’s scary;

But thoughts of others consumed my will,

I was farthest from being wary.

I was truly happy, with not much to say,

For this was still a bliss, a thousand miles away.

Never did I ever think that,

You would be so important to me,

But then again, I didn’t know,

That you were an angel I was to meet.

Like the hunter and a prey,

My mind was locked, a thousand miles away.

But among all this, one thing was clear,

That my life was beautiful and you, a part;

That as long this remains, there is no fear,

And that I know we will never be apart.

I also knew that one thing was true,

That distance can never pave its way,

For you and I will never truly be,

A thousand miles away.

The wait

The wait
The shipwreck was the omen we waited for,
That moment where everything would make sense,
And time passed like the water of the sea,
As we closed our eyes and put up another iron fence.

Waiting for disaster because we thought it meant change,
Waiting for someone or something to tell us,
To tell us that it’s okay now, it would be okay then,
Waiting for the settling of a phantom dust.

How many years did pass like that?
How many things went unsaid?
How much did we lose our sanity,
How far were our hearts misled?

Are you still waiting at the bench?
Are you still waiting for that last goodbye?
Because in the grand scheme of chaos,
Our flightless bird was never meant to fly.

To think that today is not enough,
To think that a saviour or a warrior is on the way,
Was our folly as we kept waiting for tomorrow,
As we kept wishing for a brighter day.

Twice we fell and a thousand times later,
But the time would never for us bow,
It placed the crown on the mantle of our faded dreams,
Reminded us of the desperate truth we needed to know,
Told us that the majesty of our bird was for our homeland to know,
It’s flight was just something we had to let go,
Told us open our eyes and see the afterglow,
Told us to see the glory of the unfazed rainbow.

Fallen angels of a forbidden land.

In the midst of the lights and colours,
In the middle of the dancefloor that wasn’t ours,
On the day we thought everything would change,
We were given just another band-aid for our scars.

Because silence is the price to pay for this.
Because shouting from the rooftops is not for us.
Because at the end of the day nothing is original.
And we don’t even have the right to discuss.

So the chestnut floors and the velvet curtains.
That always shadowed our light ,
Envied by all who looked from outside,
Never knew what it truly took to fight.

And they warned us before the beginning of the end.
They said it was not for the weak,
But when we poured the parting glass,
They saw a glimpse of the havoc we could wreak.

But if you ask me if I’d change anything,
If I would go back just to escape the pain,
Then I’ll just assume that you’ve never experienced,
The first glorious sunrise, a long time after a hurricane.

~Nidhi Neelesh

Soul Flames

The grass was the greenest on that side,
The stars used to shine so bright,
And everyone painted a crescent moon on their face,
But I knew it was just a piteous phase.

They slipped away like a night in July,
Leaving no sign but ashes behind my eyes,
And I tried to say it but then I was cursed,
And that’s when they named it the tragedy of the universe.

And tragedy it was when they slept,
Never to wake and see how I wept
And beautiful things often end, its true,
But how can something so ethereal be so cruel?

Hundreds of years in this life and the next,
Passing through the same street, but forgot the rest.
While somewhere, high above their world,
Something so painful for me unfurled.

So now I Spend eternity with my broken candle and time,
Because maybe one day I’ll see again the honey and wine.
Maybe one day the moon will know our love again,
Maybe one day the sun will feel bright again.

But how can I wipe away all the dousing tears,
When it happened, the thing which I most feared?
It really makes me wonder, when I look up at that barren sky,
There’s a question which plagues me and I think I know why;
Is it better to spend a life with winter mornings and no concerns?
Or is it better to know the absolute divinity, of what it’s like to love,
And what it’s like to burn?

You knew.

Our feet memorised the path to the cave,
Possessed all the virtues that god never gave.
And at that moment, in the blink of an eye,
You knew it would be inevitable to say goodbye.

Stilted looks but it didn’t matter to us
Stifling laughs on the backseat of the bus,
And as you wiped the dust from the leatherbound book,
You knew how long it would take to forget that look.

Do you think they knew? When they looked at the keys?
Do you think they knew the origin of those memories?
Because even if the devil himself would tell me yes,
I know that only you knew what we were at our best.

Summer left us all alone and sad
Heroics and poignant like we were actually mad.
How the last aster rested on the ground,
When you knew that in the end we would drown.

I thought I would like to ask for answers from you,
Why you didn’t say a word as we started anew,
But silence has a way to question every wit,
And I alone had to learn that I had a bad habit to quit

-N

The last day.

Autumn skies cried greatly and bled,
The last of the sparrows had finally fled.
Faded polaroids were lying on the floor,
Forgotten words crept away from the open door.

Time and talk had taken their leave,
Saints had lost their will to believe.
The fog had lifted but in its wake,
It shattered all the prisms we made.

Gone was the rainbow and the gold,
Gone were the stories that would never be told.
Hands slipped as the leaves fell,
Silence, but a truth everyone could tell.

What happened to the promise?
What happened to one last wish?
Always in my heart but maybe never,
Because always had lost its forever.

A blind eye we had turned for so long,
Finally we could see our heinous wrong.
And as silent goodbye never left our lips,
The cold air gave us an empty kiss.

And all this while we stood shocked and still,
Wondering about our part in this obvious kill.
When did we destroy all the roses that we grew?
When did the world lose the meaning of I love you?








-N